Birkenstock Super Birki Shearling Lined Clogs

Oh my goodness gracious me, where do I even begin with these Super Birki shoes?! Let me just start off by saying that they are described as being “perfect for gardening or work but and a popular choice for your leisure time.” Now, I don’t know about you, but when I think of leisure time, I think of cute dresses, fun accessories, and shoes that make me feel like a million dollars. But these shoes? No, no, no.

Sure, they may have a flat heel section and provide all-around protection and grip, but who cares when they are so ugly?! There is no escaping the fact that these shoes are sooo fugly! I mean, seriously, what were the designers thinking when they created these beige, boring, zero-personality shoes? It’s like they were trying to make the most unappealing shoe possible.

I know someone who dresses in shoes like these. She wears skirts down to her ankles and has the fashion sense of a 50-year-old spinster. And you know what? She probably owns these shoes too. But hey, at least she won’t get bunions, right?

Now, I know what you’re thinking. “But Shoewawa, they have shearling lining and are flexible, water- and dirt-repellent!” Yeah, yeah, I know all that. But let’s be real here. These shoes are not cute. They will never be fashionable. They will never go with anything. Unless, of course, you’re going for the mental asylum patient look.

And yet, despite all of this, people are actually buying and wearing these shoes. Madness, I tell you. Absolute madness. But if you’re one of those people who just has to have them, you can buy them at John Lewis for half price – a steal at only £40. But just know that you’ll be sacrificing your fashion sense for comfort. Is it worth it? That’s up to you to decide.